Sometimes I think it would be better if I didn’t speak. Didn’t feel. Didn’t think. Just be a part of life without being involved.
Life is hard.
Life is rough. I want to be here and not here at all.
What do I want to be? What do I want to do? Am I doing this right? What is everyone thinking about me?
I don’t care what they think. I do care what they think. I should just hide away and leave everyone alone. I want everyone to leave me alone. I’m drained. I have all the energy in the world.
I have ADHD. No, I don’t. I have manic depression. No, I don’t. I have anxiety.
Yes, that’s it. But how do I handle it? I don’t want to handle it. Why does nobody understand me? I am tired of justifying my feelings.
I am tired of people God. When will you answer? You never answer me! I am lost. I don’t know what to do. Help me! Hear me! Am I not important enough to you? Are you tired of me like everyone else? I know I am too much. I know I am not doing what I am suppose to. I try to be a part of the world and it crushes me every time. Everybody is annoyed by how I speak. Annoyed by how I think. And annoyed by my very presence.
Sometimes I think it would be better if I didn’t speak. Didn’t feel. Didn’t think.
